(C) Cheryl Howard 2008

When weighted by an oppressive gloom

That sits in your soul like a lump of doom

The sun’s arising it comes far too soon

You feel endlessly trapped in an internal room

You struggle to see beyond the now

Each second it stretches as if an hour

You face a future that tastes bitter and sour

Your mind like a sloth you have no power

It all feels pointless as if you’re just treading time

How can you look to tomorrow when your soul is blind?

So tired don’t care, the will to live you can’t find

It’s a maze of confusion in your dark, troubled mind

You’ve sunk somehow into a grey tomorrow

Joy has long gone, all that’s left is endless sorrow

Despair and hopelessness from you the world could borrow

Can’t see a way of escape from this interminable horror

Try to find reason to wake every morn

Can’t think anymore why you were even born

Long to slip away - feel tired, old and worn

Thought of ending life - but others left to mourn

You are trapped in a lie – don’t let it be!

Cry out to GOD your SAVIOR, to HIS loving side do flee

Go to the Cross, there HIS SON will set you forever free

It is HE gives true hope, the reason for life to you and me!

thought for the journey ….

Helpless, hopeless - dread and despair. Have these become your familiar companions? Are they there when you fall into a restless sleep? Awaiting you the moment your eyes begin to flicker in wakefulness? Do you dread the days ending - then dread a new one dawning?

JESUS said “I AM the LIGHT of the world, he who follows ME shall not walk in darkness.” (John 8:12). 

HE not only gives us hope when life seems hopeless - HE is our Hope, HE is The HOPE of the world!

There is nothing we can experience that our compassionate, merciful SAVIOR doesn’t understand - when we think we’ve reached the end of the road in our struggles, our suffering, our weary sorrows; that we can go no further, endure no more, that it is all too much - we need to take comfort in the knowledge that when JESUS hung upon The Cross in our stead HE went further, HE endured more. HE went to the end of every road of suffering and sorrow in our place, HE experienced the bottom of the deepest pit humanity could ever stumble into. And this HE did in HIS perfect innocence, justice and sinlessness - this HE did for love of us.

Your life does have meaning, value and purpose - you were created by an Awesome Loving GOD; to know HIM in intimate relationship, to walk with HIM in adoration and obedience. You were made for HIS glory and only in HIS Presence will you discover “fullness of joy.” Psalm 16:11 “YOU will show me the path of life; in YOUR Presence is fullness of joy; at YOUR right hand are pleasures forevermore.”

Set your desires, your longings, your heart upon HIS heart, and not upon yourself, material possessions, ’success’, power …. this world is not your permanent home, we are here for such a brief moment in time - eternity beckons. Live your life built upon The ROCK of Ages and nothing will move you, for HE HIMSELF will guard and keep you, guiding you safely home to HIMSELF.

JESUS The CHRIST came and died in your stead upon a brutal Cross, taking your sin and its deserved punishment in HIS own body - so that HE could save you! 

John 3:17 “For GOD did not send HIS SON into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through HIM might be saved.”

The choice is yours - HE  who came to give you “abundant life” (John 10:10) sets before you life and death - heed HIS heart’s cry to you, ”Choose life that you might live!” (Dueteronomy 30:19)  

(C) Cheryl Howard 2008

I love sitting at the feet of my LORD

Hanging with joy on HIS every word

There is no other place I would rather be

Than spending time, BELOVED - just YOU and me

Oh HIS Presence lights my gloomiest hour

HIS Radiance washes over me – refreshing power

Such tenderness and patience I can’t describe

Oh YOUR Splendour has my heart mesmerised

HE speaks and my soul explodes with HIS Life

HE floods me with HIS Peace and takes away my strife

As HE wraps me in HIS Love, a warm embrace

It is YOU who are my Refuge – my Safe Eternal Place

I never want to be apart from YOU

Not even a breath to be between we two

Could not bear the thought of a moment without YOU

Want YOU forever BELOVED – by YOUR side in all I do

YOU are the Lover of my soul from tender years

YOU are my Hero and YOU conquer all my fears

My heart forever held within YOUR own

YOU wipe my tears and YOUR arms will bring me Home

How I long and sigh so deeply for that Day

When this world by sin will no more be held sway

Oh my Champion, come in YOUR Power and YOUR Light

And bring YOUR loved ones home in YOUR Matchless Might

We YOUR Bride await with oiled lamps, watching and ready

Follow YOU Alone through life, unerring and steady

Our eyes are fixed on YOU and no one else

For YOU are our Reward and our heart’s Wealth!

thought for the journey ….

Live one day at a time - not careless over tomorrow, but free from the ‘cares’ of tomorrow!

We have all heard that worry is the opposite of trust - yet for many the challenge to let go of the worries and concerns of an unsure and unknown tomorrow is a hurdle they find almost insurmountable.

How do I stop worrying and move from anxiety to trust?

The key is found in the very character and nature of our GOD and SAVIOR. It is as we grow in our knowledge of HIM, and our intimacy with HIM, that we learn we have nothing to fear - because HE is greater and more powerful than anything we could face. Genuine trust comes out of relationship. It is almost impossible to trust The LORD if you haven’t discovered, and therefore don’t know, that HE is trustworthy! It is beyond us to stop fearing ‘giants’ if we haven’t learnt that GOD is OMNIPOTENT - All Powerful! It is unbelievably difficult to cease from dreading devastation and harm if we don’t truly know that ALMIGHTY GOD is good and desires wholeheartedly to do us good!

Romans 8:28 “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love GOD, to those who are called according to HIS purpose.”

Our SAVIOR does understand our tendancy to worry, anxiety and fearfulness - that is why HIS Word to us is so full of counsel and instruction to ‘not worry’, to ‘not fear’, to ‘be anxious for nothing…..’ But HE doesn’t stop there - HE tells us why we must not worry, and in the telling HE shows us how.

Philipians 4:6-8“Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to GOD; and the peace of GOD, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through CHRIST JESUS. Finally brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy - meditate on these things.”

Fear, anxiety and worry will not vacate on their own - they must be banished, and the surest way of banishing their nasty little presence is to follow the counsel of GOD’s Word. Take your burdens to your Loving Heavenly FATHER in prayer - release them into HIS caring and capable hands. Fill your mind with praise and thanksgiving, fill your thoughts with HIS Word - meditate on it, and as you do you will discover HIM, HIS goodness, faithfulness, mercy, long-suffering, kindness, patience, compassion, power, purity, holiness, righteousness…

HE has promised HIS own in Hebrews 13:5-6 “Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For HE Himself has said, ‘I will never leave you nor forsake you.’ So we may boldly say: ‘The LORD is my Helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me?’” and that is why JESUS commanded us in Matthew 6:33-34 “But seek first the Kingdom of GOD and HIS righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”

(C) Cheryl Howard 2009

I cannot live without YOU, not even for a day

I stagger lost without YOU, YOU are The Only Way

Without YOUR light I’m blind, groping in the dark

I see a future empty, devoid of life and stark

Without YOU I am shrivelled, a shadow without form

If it wasn’t for YOUR Cross LORD, I’d still be dead, unborn

YOU are my breath of life, YOUR heart it beats in mine

Forever am I grateful that YOU stepped down into time

YOU took my sins upon YOU, YOU covered me with grace

YOU are unchanging Truth, in YOUR Atonement rests my faith

And what unsearchable riches, my LORD are found in YOU

YOUR Blood upon The Cross LORD, did for me what I can’t do

It is YOUR heart that is my treasure, YOUR Face that I seek

YOU Alone delight my soul, I yearn each day to hear YOU speak

For YOU are Life Eternal, Merciful, Righteous, Pure

The more O LORD I know YOU, I long to know YOU more, and more!

thought for the journey ….  

The miracle of CHRISTmas, the yearly celebration, exists because of ALMIGHTY GOD’s great heart of love towards HIS lost, fallen and rebellious creation. If GOD had not incarnated HIMSELF in Baby JESUS 2000 odd years ago, the world would indeed be a grim and ‘hope’less place. But we have JESUS - IMMANUEL, GOD with us; The Hope of the world ….. what a reason to celebrate, what joy, what wonder, what undeserved grace - what hope!

The miracle is that a Holy, Righteous, Just and Perfect GOD loves flawed, selfish, sin stained, self obsessed, failure ridden humanity - and not because we are so ‘lovable’ but because HE has imbued us with great worth and HE IS LOVE!

When we see our own ‘ugliness’ and unrighteousness, we are right - for all our ‘righteousness’ is as filthy rags (Isaiah 64:6) - and we must run to our SAVIOR Who fills us with HIS imputed righteousness. We have nothing to redeem ourselves, nothing to commend ourselves - yet HE chose us, loves us, and HE will fill us with HIS love and goodness, for HIS manifest glory - if we yield to HIM, trusting in the work of HIS Cross, the Power of HIS Blood, and receive!

Hold our own lives lightly, secure in the knowledge that YHWH holds them priceless! Oh how imperative it is that we know ‘who we are in CHRIST’ - not that we know “who we are”, but that we know who we are “in CHRIST”

The miracle is that not only does our Holy CREATOR love us, but HE yearns for us to be reconciled to HIMSELF - and an even greater miracle is that HE took upon HIMSELF the cost, the task and burden of reconciling us, of washing us clean from the filth of our sin, of redeeming us - of rescuing us through JESUS The CHRIST, SAVIOR of all who would hear HIS voice and heed HIS command to “Repent for the Kingdom of heaven is at hand” (Matthew 4:17) 

“All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned, every one, to his own way; and The LORD has laid on HIM the iniquity of us all.” Isaiah 53:6

This is the true message of CHRISTmas - the Gospel of the Grace of GOD!

(C) Cheryl Howard 2008

A heart torn with grief you cling to hope,

Arms aching and empty you struggle to cope.

O how did this happen and how could this sorrow be?

Could never imagine how wrenching this loss to see.

O how brief did you hold your babe in your arms,

Enchanted by him, heart melted by his charms.

In the midst of this darkness, this anguish and pain,

You know your GOD’s good, and HIS love doesn’t change.

No gain to ask, Why didn’t he live and not die?

Your suffering so deep, find no ease when you cry.

Can only hold on to a SAVIOR who is love,

And choose to still trust this tender GOD from above.

For reasons unknown HIS wisdom allowed,

This near crushing blow, to HIS beloved avowed!

HIS hands grasp you yet, clasped to HIS breast,

HIS future for you, to give you HIS treasured best!

HE understands your despair, confusion and grief,

Words of life and of hope to your heart HE would speak.

In the valley of darkness, the shadow of death,

HE who walked there before you holds you when nothing is left.

HE who holds your sweet babe in HIS loving embrace,

Will treasure him there till you see HIM face to face.

That day will come sooner than you could dare dream,

And together you’ll rejoice, your tears washed in HIS streams.

thought for the journey …..

Heartache, suffering and loss.

Live long enough and all of these will touch your life with more than a passing brush. Be it the unfathomable loss of a cherished newborn babe; the sudden, or drawn out loss of a beloved partner, or much loved family member or friend …. unfaithfulness, broken dreams, divorce, financial ruin, desertion, betrayal, unspeakable brutality, callous cruelty, cold indifference ….. the list could fill pages.

Yet so often we struggle with the whys - why did this happen? why did this happen to me? why didn’t YOU stop it LORD? why did YOU allow it?

How often we blame our Loving Heavenly FATHER for the consequences of a fallen and broken world, blame HIM for the devastation and death that our sin and rebellion has introduced to a world HE created perfect.

Yet GOD endures our unjust and injurious accusations with patience and longsuffering, never giving up on us and continuing to love us faithfully and steadily.

HE could do what so many of us do, when we are reviled, rejected and wounded - withdraw in ’self’ protection and shut down; shutting us out…. Imagine the darkness and grief, the turmoil, selfishness and hatred that would be unleashed and run rampant and unchecked amongst us if HE totally withdrew HIS Presence!  

Job 34:14-15 “If HE should set HIS heart on it, if HE should gather to HIMSELF HIS SPIRIT and HIS breath, all flesh would perish together and man would return to dust.”

Oh if only we could have the faith and trust in HIM that HE so deserves - not doubting HIS goodness, HIS character and integrity!

HE has proven, over and over and over again, HIS steadfast love, HIS loving-kindness, HIS daily mercies, HIS unearned grace, HIS faithfulness, power, and HIS SELF sacrifice. Yet still we doubt HIM, attributing to HIM our own faithless and changeable, selfish and truculent natures. How our doubts accuse HIM who is so undeserving of them - and how insiduously they worm their way into our hearts and cut us off from the comfort, grace and strength HE so longs to pour into our aching, suffering hearts. They blind us with their poison so that not only do we lose sight of HIS outstretched hand - but we push it aside as HE reaches out to us.

Faith and trust!

That’s what it all comes down to. Do we have faith in CHRIST our SAVIOR who laid down HIS own truly Innocent Life for our sin ravaged, guilt ridden ones? Do we trust HIM to bring life out of our death, hope out of our despair, light out of our darkness, joy out of our grief, love out of our hate and forgiveness out of our bitterness? Do we trust HIM to transform our pain into something of value? We should - for all HE has ever done is prove HIMSELF Faithful, Loving, Able, Good and True.

Isaiah 61:1-3 “The SPIRIT of The LORD GOD is upon ME, because The LORD has anointed ME to preach good tidings to the poor, HE has sent ME to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives and the opening of the prison to (those who are) bound; to proclaim the acceptable year of The LORD, and the day of vengeance of our GOD; to comfort all who mourn, to console those who mourn in Zion, to give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they may be called trees of righteousness, the planting of The LORD, that HE may be glorified.” 

HE deserves our faith and trust - and as we offer them up to HIM, it is we who will discover the Love, Life, Peace, and even Joy of Mighty GOD invading our suffering and sorrow. It may take time, lots of time; but as we yield it all to the SAVIOR, HE can and will redeem our anguish and pain for HIS glory and our eternal good.

Psalm 30:10-12 “Hear O LORD and have mercy on me; LORD be my Helper! YOU have turned for me my mourning into dancing; YOU have put off my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness, to the end that glory may sing praise to YOU and not be silent. O LORD my GOD I will give thanks to YOU forever.”